Meeting a partner was often reliant on chance encounters — a glance across a room, a friend’s casual introduction or meeting an unexpectedly charming neighbor in the lobby of your building. Now, dating has become less about serendipity and more about strategy, subscriptions and some serious spending.
The dating services industry in the U.S. hit $9.27 billion in 2024 and is projected to climb to $13.4 billion by 2030, according to a Research and Markets report. What was once a swipe-based time-killer is now a full-on investment — both emotionally and financially.
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The TikTok account Everybodyhasasecret recently shared the story of how one woman spent $24,000 on a matchmaking service that paired her with the man who is now her husband. “It was worth every penny,” she said. “I know the way I met him is not your typical romantic dating story. It was very arranged and intentional.”
With $24,000, this user paid for just five curated matches. Meanwhile, apps like Raya — the members-only dating platform that costs up to $49.99 a month — are seeing more people pay for exclusivity, access and maybe a second date that doesn’t involve ghosting.
As more singles start treating love like an investment, the question is no longer if people are willing to pay for connection, but whether it’s actually paying off.
The business of matchmaking
Online dating might be dominated by Gen Z and millennials — with 53% of adults under 30 using dating apps at some point in their lives — but older Americans haven’t exactly been left behind. In fact, 37% of people aged 30 to 49 and 20% of those between 50 and 64 have dipped their toes into the digital dating pool, according to Pew Research.
Apps cater to just about every age bracket and romantic niche out there. Match, for example, has carved out a reputation as a go-to platform for users over 50 — allowing up to 4,000 characters in a bio and 26 photo uploads so you can really paint the full picture (or at least a flattering one).
Yet behind every swipe is a business model built on a paradox. Dating apps are designed to help users find meaningful connections but each successful match means two fewer users and, potentially, two lost streams of recurring revenue.
As a result, most platforms operate on a “freemium” model: free to join, but with limited functionality. Premium features such as enhanced visibility or seeing who’s already liked your profile are often paywalled.
Dominique Laurencelle, a 37-year-old from Victoria, B.C., has been navigating the world of dating apps on and off for nearly 20 years. On a recent scroll through Tinder, she noticed the app teasing her with photos of three users who had already swiped right on her.
"But if you want to message them and swipe on them, you have to pay," she told CBC.
It’s becoming a common tactic: frustrate users just enough with the limitations of the free version and suddenly that “Upgrade to Premium” button starts looking like a lifeline. But shelling out for features doesn’t guarantee you’ll find love — or even a half-decent conversation.
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Does it really work?
Unlike many dating platforms, Raya skips the freemium model entirely — there’s no free version and no trial period, just a membership fee and the promise of exclusivity. But some users are starting to question whether that promise holds up.
Matt, 35, told Grazia Daily that his time on Raya was far from elite. “No real talent, just boring posers from far-flung reaches who thought it was cool to talk about private jets and air miles," he said. Another frustrated user, who goes by RachRachCity on X, says she is cancelling her Raya subscription for Linkedin Premium.
People are still willing to pay for apps like Raya — not just for the slim chance of matching with Ben Affleck or Shawn Mendes (both of whom have reportedly been spotted on the platform), but for the sense of status it offers.
Dating coach Hayley Quinn told Metro that Raya’s appeal lies in its exclusivity. “You’re not here just to meet anyone, but to meet someone as beautiful and as cool as you,” she explains.
Spending money on love doesn’t always guarantee better results. Sure, it worked for the woman who dropped $24,000 on a matchmaking service, but a higher price tag doesn’t necessarily mean a higher-quality match.
Today, dating might feel more transactional than ever, but it’s not hopeless. If you’re navigating the dating world without a big budget, focus on platforms that align with your values and offer meaningful ways to connect.
If you do decide to pay, treat it like any other investment: know what you’re getting, set expectations and understand what success looks like for you — whether that’s a partner, a plus-one or just a decent first date.
And while serendipitous moments may feel rare, don’t write off the power of real-life encounters — sometimes the best connections happen when (and where) you least expect them.
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This article provides information only and should not be construed as advice. It is provided without warranty of any kind.
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