
When Alice Stone Nakhimovsky’s husband, Alexander, passed away unexpectedly last year from a brain aneurysm, she lost more than her partner. She also lost every detail of their financial life.
The 75-year-old retired professor had written 11 books, yet she didn’t understand the language of finance. Her husband had always handled that side of things.
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“It’s mostly because I have no interest in learning about investing,” Nakhimovsky told The Wall Street Journal (1).
She knew they had saved more than $1 million, but she didn’t understand how it was allocated or even how much she could safely spend each month to make it last through retirement. She also knew she was “a sitting duck” if she didn’t figure it out.
It took her a year to get everything sorted, and she now regrets not doing it earlier. After all, she said, “catastrophe can strike at any time.”
What’s at stake
Women tend to live longer than men, which means they’re more likely to be widowed and more likely to need a bigger nest egg.
Life expectancy in the U.S. is 75.8 years for males and 81.1 years for females (2). A woman also has a 7-in-10 chance of outliving her husband, either due to life expectancy or marriage age gaps (3).
Yet, while 30% of high-earning heterosexual women in the U.S. are now the primary breadwinners, “less than half prefer that role,” according to UBS’s 2023 Own Your Worth report. Only half of those breadwinners engage in short- and long-term financial decisions (4).
“Less than half, 49%, of women primary earners in heterosexual relationships say they prefer that arrangement, compared to 87% of men breadwinners,” the report found.
If you’re completely dependent on your spouse or partner to handle the finances, becoming suddenly widowed or divorced can derail your life at a time when you’re already dealing with intense emotions.
A 2024 study on widowed women found that just under half experienced financial challenges after their spouse’s passing, with 51% “either living paycheck to paycheck or struggling to manage their bills.” Of those surveyed, 41% said they “didn’t have any financial conversations or plans in place prior to their spouse passing away.”
Financial illiteracy, whether you’re a widow or not, can result in mismanaged assets, poor investment decisions and a higher risk of falling for scams. Widows may also miss out on Social Security or pension benefits, leaving money on the table that could help buffer a difficult transition.
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What to do before catastrophe strikes
There’s no better time than the present to become financially literate. After all, knowledge is power.
It’s smart to share financial documents, account numbers and passwords with your partner. If one person handles the investing, it’s important to review those decisions together and talk about why certain choices were made or when you might sell or buy more. Regular check-ins can keep both partners informed.
Of course, one partner may have zero interest in these conversations. Nakhimovsky told the Wall Street Journal she would “zone out” when her husband discussed investing and he would lose patience. If that sounds familiar, it may be time to bring in a financial advisor who can act as a mediator.
It’s also a good idea to choose a financial advisor together, one you both trust. About 70% of women change advisors after their spouse’s death, according to a report by Transamerica, which it says is “a clear indication they feel underserved by the wealth management industry (6).”
Make sure beneficiaries are listed on retirement accounts, annuities and life insurance policies, and ensure those beneficiaries know about the accounts. Keep documents organized and accessible, whether in a binder, a secure online portal or both.
Ideally, you’ll tackle these tasks while both partners are alive and well. If not, things can get a lot more complicated.
For someone who’s suddenly widowed and overwhelmed, a financial professional can help create a new budget based on a single income and explain how this will impact Social Security benefits and tax filing status. They can also help adjust an investment portfolio to match the widow’s comfort level with risk.
With the help of an advisor, Nakhimovsky consolidated about a half-dozen investment accounts, rolled over others to prevent a large tax bill and swapped some individual stocks for cash and municipal bonds to reduce the risk in her portfolio.
Still, she could have avoided a lot of stress and uncertainty by learning about their finances before her husband died.
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Article sources
We rely only on vetted sources and credible third-party reporting. For details, see our editorial ethics and guidelines.
The Wall Street Journal (1); CDC (2); HAL Open Science (3); Thrivent (4), Transamerica (5).
This article provides information only and should not be construed as advice. It is provided without warranty of any kind.